I don’t know

Whenever there is something I want to convince you I don’t care about I have a variety of possible responses. I might say, “I don’t care,” but probably not. “I don’t care” is just too simple, too direct, and too non-passionate to convey any sincerity at this point in our history when “phenomenal” means second rate. “I don’t give a darn” or a “damn,” too, is too weak nowadays, so I’m more likely to go with a “rat’s ass” or a “shit” or a “fuck” or even a “flying fuck,”  knowing that the louder, the more vulgar I got, the more I believe you’d understand just how important it is to me that you believe I don’t care about whatever it is that occupies this particular moment in our conversation.

What I saying here—and, frankly, I’m not too sure this is something I want to be known for—is that regardless of how important or unimportant our topic is to me, it is still more more important that I convince you that, quite frankly, Miss (or Mr. or Ms.) Scarlett, I don’t give a _______! (You may fill in the blank here, but “rat’s ass” is definitely my favorite.)

Right now I’m thinking of Omar Mateen who seemed—according to the NY Times—to be deeply committed to convincing himself and the rest of the world that he was not gay. Maybe, maybe not. Maybe I don’t give (all the way to) a flying fuck about Omar Mateen’s motivations or self-perception. Of course should I say it in just that way, you’ll have more than sufficient reason to doubt the veracity of my claim to indifference. You might—I might think—think, “If he doesn’t care about this, why is he making such a big deal out of telling me he doesn’t care about it?” Then you just might use that logic to feel yourself more perceptive of my true inner being than—dare I say it?—I myself.

Such a claim to superiority could certainly lead to no good, and we both know that!

In the wake of Mateen’s killing of 49 people and wounding of more than 50 others there have been postings on Facebook and other social media of the ease with which Americans currently are able to obtain AR-15’s.

  • One woman claimed it took her all of 7 minutes to do so at a Pennsylvania Walmart. Now Walmart has announced it will suspend all AR-15 sales, so you know it’s stock will be sold off to far less conscious retailers to then be sold to an eager American public.
  • A man (I think he was in Georgia) lollygagged at the cash register–perhaps reading the Enquirer, so it took him 15 minutes to become so armed.

Now some of you have seen the video of me quite competent with a variety of pistols pouring lead into a target in northwestern Connecticut. How big a stretch is it to imagine that same me, not an Enquirer reader, AR-15 in hand, proving beyond the shadow of a doubt that I did, indeed, not care about whatever we might have been discussing? And yes, that includes such delicate issues as the Yankees pitching rotation, the use of small, hidden motors on Tour de France bicycles or the Tony award for best costume design in a musical revival.

And for those of you who might be wondering, “Why doesn’t he just shut the hell up and show us some pictures,” here they are.

Thank you very much.


Sideshow Goshko at KGB Bar

Sideshow Goshko at KGB Bar. Sideshow Goshko is a delightful once-a-month storytelling event.


Benny & Topher at 9

Benny & Topher, my grandsons, at 9


St. Patrick's Cathedral, NY

St. Patrick’s Cathedral, NY



A subway moment with no one visibly using earbuds.


Central Park

Central Park


David & Felipe's

David & Felipe’s apartment


Brooklyn Botanic Garden

Brooklyn Botanic Garden


[Jack &] Sonyo

[Jack &] Sonyo

Published in: on June 16, 2016 at 6:41 pm  Comments (8)  

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8 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. This from Dorothy:

    Your first paragraph was very insightful! It’s a shame many more folks don’t take the time to think beyond the headines.


  2. I kind of care to make a comment. Or maybe not. I’ll check with Schrödinger’s cat…


  3. I’ll take another read of your post. It’s hard for me to respond thoughtfully about the horror.

    But I did want to say that this is a fabulous batch of photos. I love the doors and lamp, the dappled shadows on the rock, the Sylvia Plathy pix on the subway, and I’m simply charmed by the two in the elevator.
    All nice, Richard.


  4. Excellent work–you managed to hit the broad side of a barn ie not be a completely unreliable narrator, on an occasion when it’s hard to. As to the pictures they’re great like always.


  5. Photos wonderful. Skimmed the words. Read about the bike. Imagine falling for the scam



  6. Hi Richard,

    Nice to see you are back.
    Not offended. Couldn’t agree more.
    Crazy world.
    I think that people should be armed with pasta primavera.
    Then they can choose, linguine, ziti or penne and cause as much destruction as they want.
    Assault rifles are a product of insanity.




  7. Sure is a labor of love.




  8. A multifaceted, colorful,seemingly endless variety of visions that
    engulf our daily lives as we strive to connect to a mysterious and
    unfathomable reality is how your blog impresses me.
    There are two major opposing thoughts among existential philosophers.
    One believes that our cultural environment imposes serious limitations
    on our capacity to think and behave beyond traditional and established
    norms. Actually they advocate living within these parameters.
    The other is exemplified with the bewildering array of human experiences
    described in your blog.We begin to understand that the most insignificant
    events are tangible examples of a reality that affect our lives. The photos
    are the most potent illustrations! Your open mind and passion for the
    unknown have acted as the forces of liberation.Your unrelenting drive
    to interact with our cultural environment is what places you squarely
    in the opposing group. The ultimate objective is to discover our
    continually evolving selves.

    I was also moved by your loving memories of your father on the
    50th anniversary of his death.From your description he was the
    kind of father I would have liked. My father died when I was an
    infant and I only know what my older siblings told me about him.
    A scholar, a devoted father and the wisdom to honor the virtue
    of humility. Whatever I am today would have been vastly different
    had he lived.
    Phil Knight the co-founder of Nike has a written a powerful column
    in the Times about his father who was unable to love him and
    describes how unusual it is for a father to connect to a son.
    Definitely worth reading.



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